Today...while watching Dr. Phil...my entertainment of the day, there was a woman who had apparently had a horrible break up. Her ex had broke her heart and she wanted revenge. So, she went to his house and destroyed everything. When he came home, he had his locks changed so she wouldn't have the right key. When she came back to do more damage...she found that she couldn't get in. Her next step...if she can't get in, neither should he, therefore, she put glue in his locks so he couldn't unlock the door. All of this gave her an idea to start a website where women can get together and read ideas for revenge. Here are a few that I remember.
1. Boil his clothes so that they shrink.
2. Have someone else on the site call your man and have her insult him while you listen.
3. Pregnancy scares.
4. STD scares.
5. Cut off all the plugs on his electrical items.
6. Pretend to be a girl he met at a club and see if he would cheat on you with this "make believe" girl.
7. Place his picture on the website so other women will be warned.
8. Write stuff on his clothing in blacklight pens so they only show up in black lights.
The list goes on and on...if you want to go to this site here it is http://www.makehimpay.net/
*One woman was so mad that when her ex was sleeping she glued his penis to his stomach, his testicles to his legs and his buttcheeks together. Now if you ask me this is a little extreme and the court agreed...she recieved 6 mouths of probation for assult.
We have all had ex's that have pissed us off, but would you ever take it this far? Oh, and just so you know, the woman who started this website b/c of her horrible ex to whom she destroyed his place, she is now back with him. Oh how ironic things can be. Which brings me to the song of the day.
Ironic by Alanis Morissette
An old man turned ninety-eight
He won the lottery and died the next day
It's a black fly in your Chardonnay
It's a death row pardon two minutes too late
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures
Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly
He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids goodbye
He waited his whole damn life to take that flight
And as the plane crashed down he thought"Well isn't this nice..."
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures
Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face
A traffic jam when you're already late
A no-smoking sign on your cigarette break
It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife
It's meeting the man of my dreams
And then meeting his beautiful wife
And isn't it ironic...dontcha think
A little too ironic...and yeah I really do think...
It's like rain on your wedding day
It's a free ride when you've already paid
It's the good advice that you just didn't take
Who would've thought...it figures
Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out
Helping you out
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4 comments:
Favorite Revenges:
1) One of Willie Nelson's ex wives is said to have gotten tired of being knocked around so one night when he was drunk she wrapped him in a sheet and beat him with a skillet!
2) Someone I know says she poured powdered milk on her exes yard. He never noticed until it rained & then the weather warmed up and his yard smelt like sour milk.
3) Shrimp dinner http://www.ebaumsworld.com/2006/09/CurtainRods.html
4) Ask your AFl about chocolates for her ex!
As far as today's song... BRAVO! I have this one and if I so desire I can listen to it 532 times until my ears are bleeding and I no longer hear the throbbing lyrics in my head!
Ok I'll tell you about chocolates. 2nd hubby stalked me after divorce. So Valentines day, I gathered up dried horse turds. I bought a heart shaped box of candy. dumped candy, saved wrappers. Melted chocolate, dipped horse turds in chocolate and wrapped it all back up. Left it at the local cafe, where I knew he would show up. It simply said, to Lonnie. It was late when he arrived, picked them up. Ate some on the way home, and yes he was pissed. But he got the point.
Remind me never to cheat on you, my dear.
When my friend Q broke up with Will, she tenderly placed a parting gift in the kitchen sink under all the dishes. She knew that it would be a long time before he found it. Two weeks later the smell in Will's apartment was overwhelming. Q's gift was a raw chicken.
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