This is a blog of random stuff so just deal with my jumping from one story to the next.
Today my parents put Tiger to sleep. I have had my tiger cat since I was 4ish that would make him 17. He used to take baths with me in the tube, drool on my face when I was sleeping and bring my HUGE frogs, mice, birds, and bugs to my bed as 'presents'. Anyone who says pets aren't family is FULL OF SHIT. So I just wanted to say that he will be missed.
The conversation of the day goes as follows...
R (me): This is where we get the 'Market Pantry rice crispy bars.
J (co-worker): What do we use those for?
R: They go at the bottom of our turkey combo sandwiches.
J: (looking confused) Doesn't that taste funny?
R: You don't put the bar on the sandwich, it gets wrapped with the sandwich to be eated as dessert.
*As I slam my head into the shelves thinking did she really just ask that*
Event of the day...Olivia got her shots today and I am not sure who hurt more her or I. She has slept most of the day but when she wakes up she SCREAMS as if saying MAKE ME A BOTTLE NOW BITCH YOU LET THEM DO THIS TO ME NOW YOU WILL PAY. Poor little girl.
Lesson of the day...Don't dress nice!!!
Let me set the scene. I NEVER get to dress nice, it is either work cloths or comfy cloths b/c I have nowhere to go. For some reason I decided that I would dress kinda nice today. So, I put on my favorite pair of lowrise jeans, my tan and pink heeled sandals and a cute little pink polo with a V-cut neck line. So nothing great but I was happy with how I looked. After Olivia's shots I came home and parked my car in my parking spot behind my apartments. I open my door and notice a black man (Note: I have nothing against black people so don't think I am racist) approaching me. He reachs out his hand to shake my hand
M (man): Hi, my name is (I don't remember...oops)...
R (me): I'm Noelle.
M: I just moved here and I have a question. What is the neighborhood like?
R: Not too bad, I am usually in my apartment or not around at all so I am not real sure.
M: Okay, tell me something else, are you single?
R: No.
M: That's cool that's cool I respect that.
R: Umm, Okay.
*the man is now talking on his cell phone.
M: Sorry, I was just talking to the new neighbor Noelle.
P (person on phone): blah blah blah
M: No she is...
*I step out of the car.
M: ...HOLY SHIT she has a body on her.
*apparently he didn't see the car seat.
P: blah blah blah.
M: No, you don't understand she has a body that won't quit.
*I walk around the car and take Olivia out of her car seat.
M: You got a new baby?
R: Yep, 6 weeks old.
M: You just had a baby?
R: Yes.
M: Damn dude (talking on the phone) she just had a baby. She has a smokin body for just having a baby.
M: You really just had a baby?
R: Yes 6 weeks again.
*Walk inside as fast as possible.
So, my only question what was my 'body not quitting?'
Please let me know if you have any ideas...I am baffled.
How'd you find me?
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3 comments:
So who was OJ talking to on the phone?
Dyck... in case you wanted to know, my lovely cousin's ring size is... 2 carats!
Love you MOLE...
...I don't know about you, but my body won't quit...
...jiggling
...itching
...sweating
...smelling (yes, I need a shower)
...coughing
...dreaming of one full night of sleep!!
Uncle Cletus caught you a big ass old mouse today in the live trap. He knows how bad you feel about Tiger no longer being able to bring them to you,, so be watching your mailbox... Mighty Mouse is coming first class, to a mailbox near you..(If the package smells funny when it arrives,,it could be mice don't travel well in a jar,,or it could be the moldy cheese he put in there for it to eat..
he he he love AFL
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